From a time of being broken down to built up

Sometimes you have to be broken down in order to be built back up to the person that God has called you to be.

"Break me to mend me again" is something I did not pray and ask the Lord for but it was what I really needed. For years, I struggled with my faith but it was not as extreme as this past year. The "good" difference with last year leading up to this year is that throughout my struggles I was able to encounter God more than I ever did before. It reminded me of this one scripture that says, "the Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit" (psalm 34:18). God showed me that he was not afraid of seeing me in my mess and that in fact he did not want me to pretend to be perfect with him. It's also impossible to hide anything with God (lol), as he knows our every thought and what is in our hearts. God saw that my heart was burdened and he started to take away those burdens daily, as I felt it one by one being lifted off of me. 

    Through my brokenness I was able to be corrected, healed and strengthened. Through my brokenness I was able to learn the beauty of faith and what it meant to put my trust in God even when I was at a place of hopelessness and saw no results yet. Through my brokenness I learned to completely surrender my life to Christ. Lastly, through my brokenness I was able to experience God's mercy, grace and love, which helped push me to start becoming the woman I am called to be and to start fulfilling my purpose.         

    The moment that I knew my season changed was in march of this year when my mom was praying over me. So many things were happening to me spiritually and I needed God to answer me, to fight for me, to deliver me, I just needed God to do something! Then, God spoke to me through a scripture, Nehemiah 2. In this scripture, Nehemiah was sad in the presence of his King and the King asked him what was making him sad and he said the state of his city Jerusalem and how it was ruined. Then, Nehemiah asked for permission to go and re-build the walls of Jerusalem and the King allowed him and God gave him the success to rebuild the broken walls and none of his foes could stop him. Relating to my life, I knew I was about to enter into a new season of rebuilding and that God would give me the right tools to be successful. I felt a strong impression on my heart that God was telling me that it was time to rebuild my natural and spiritual life to his original intent. 

    When I tell you how happy I was at this revelation because I was so tired of going through the roller coaster of emotions I was having daily and the oppression/attacks I was experiencing spiritually. I was so sick of crying and struggling. I was so fed up with feeling like I was always failing and my heart feeling like it was being stomped on every time as a result. So, I was ready for this transformation! I was ready to rise up in my spirit! I was ready to see my story change! What a painful process but oh so liberating to surrender yourself and life to God and be completely changed. For the word says, "Let the redeemed of the Lord share their story" (lo7:2) and I have been taking you guys along mine. I am excited to share with you guys more of the new things that have been manifesting in my life.

To anyone going through a season where your feeling like nothing is working in your life or your in a place of brokenness, my advice and encouragement to you is to keep looking ahead and looking up to God because the best is yet to come. 

Thanks guys for tuning in, have a blessed Sunday and week coming! 💞