How to Choose Joy ( 8 practical steps)

In my previous blog, I shared my testimony of how I overcame depression and mentioned that in the process I had to make the decision to choose joy. I realized as some of you reached out to me, that I needed to fully explain how I did that because for some it might have read as a simple thing to say but you're wondering how I actually did it. For this exact reason, I wanted to make a follow-up blog on the steps that I took to choose joy.

    Choosing joy is not an easy task to do, in fact, I would say it's even harder than being sad, which is why I am going to emphasize that this is not an overnight transformation. So, if you choose to follow these steps just know it's not a one-time thing to do and expect results but a thing that you need to continually do because it is a process.

Now, let's get to it, how do you choose joy?

    

1. Realize that it is a choice 

I would say the first step to choosing joy is coming to the realization that it is a CHOICE. My mom made me realize that when she looked at me one day and asked me "why do you choose to be sad"? This question pissed me off so much that I stormed away from her and said "what does she know"? "Does she know that I don't choose to be unhappy but that these thoughts and feelings just attack me unexpectedly and are out of my control"? I was so mad at her but then I stopped and really thought about her question and the word choice she used and then it dawned on me... it is a choice whether I liked it or not! Even though these thoughts and emotions come, I can choose to let them consume me or say NO I do not accept you, you are a lie from the pit of hell, and start professing the positive things that God says about me. 

2. Read the word of God (see what God's word says about joy) 

In scripture it is repeated that joy comes from God and joy also comes from reading the word of God, "thy word was unto me the joy and rejoicing of mine heart: for I am called by thy name, O Lord of hosts"(Jeremiah 15:16). I had to start reading the word of God, which helped empower my spirit and made me more positive because it helped change the way I saw myself. Although the Bible was written so long ago, we can relate it to our situations now and know that God is not just speaking about the people of that time but also future generations to come, like you and me because his word lives on. Also, Nehemiah 8:10 says that the joy of the Lord is your strength, I had to stop looking at it as just a saying and take it for what it is, which is the true and living word of God.

3. Speak it until you start to believe it

Another thing I had to do was keep repeating the word of God, which spoke life to my spirit because the Lord said that life and death are in our tongues. I had to keep speaking "the joy of the Lord is my strength" into my spirit even when I did not feel it because I knew that the words that I spoke were changing my reality even though I did not see it yet. One thing that I've been learning this year is that you sometimes need to speak out the things you want to see changed in your life because as we learn from God, words are powerful and can steer the direction of your life and in the appointed time the things you have spoken out will begin to manifest.

4. Know the characteristics of the Spirit of God 

When you know who you are and the spirit that you have within you it will be easier to not accept depression. In my testimony, I spoke about a revelation on depression, which is that it is an oppressive spirit and the opposite of the spirit of God. We are made in God's image and have the spirit of God within us, therefore, it is not in our nature to be depressed and this is proven in Galatians 5:22, 23 as it describes the fruits (characteristics) of the spirit as love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness and temperance. We have all these fruits of the spirit within us, therefore, joy is our portion and depression is not! The devil was first depressed and he tries to use this same feeling to keep a lot of us in bondage but we have to discern and know that it is a spirit and not us.

5. Learn to give it all to God

God literally tells us to cast all of our cares to him so why don't we? I had to learn to truly submit every feeling and thought I had to God, which I struggled with. Sometimes we find it hard to admit that we are not in control and that we need to just surrender it all to God. I really had to learn to open my heart and let God in, which brought me through a process of healing and deliverance. Once I learned to give it all to God, a heavy burden that weighed me down began to lift and allowed God to work on my heart, mind, and spirit. 

6. Learn to forgive yourself and others

Holding on to negative feelings for someone or yourself takes away your sense of peace and does not leave any room for joy to come into your heart. Through the recent years, I have forgiven people who had a negative impact on me but in these past couple of months, God has also taught me to forgive myself. Forgiving others and myself was a big relief for my heart and spirit because those feelings: bitterness, resentment, sadness, and pain stored up from not forgiving was feeding my depression. 

7.  Change your mindset and perspective

It all starts with the mind and the Lord knows that, which is why God says to us to be transformed by the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:2). The only way we can truly change is by reconstructing the way we think, which plays a vital part in the way we view ourselves and live our lives. I had to ask God to change my mindset and perspective to see the bigger picture. God sees and knows our future. What we are going through we will not go through forever there are appointed times when God gets us out of tribulation. The tribulation is not there to break us or because God enjoys seeing his children suffering but it is there to build us up and teach us perseverance and to trust God even in the hard times. Just remember Jesus also faced tribulations and suffered when he was here too.

8. Establish a true relationship with God

I grew up knowing about God and in the church. I used to think that that was all you needed, which was to know God (check), read my bible (check), go to church (check) and pray (check) but as I grew older and wiser I realized that was not enough. There is a scripture in the bible when God says that these people honour me on their lips but their hearts are far from me (Matthew 15:8), this scripture always made me stop and think but I did not know the depth of its meaning until now. A lot of us think we know God but we really do not even if we believe and do all those things we are expected to do and that is when it becomes religious instead of relational. As a result, these things felt routine-like to me and because of that, I was inconsistent in my faith. However, I knew I was missing more because I was feeling very unsatisfied; I had to pray and ask God to remove the religious barrier so that I could truly get to know God on a relational level. 

Once I established true fellowship with God, I suddenly felt complete, satisfied, and at peace, which made me happier and it became easier to choose joy. (Cool fact: In the bible it says and I also can attest to this that when you have a closer relationship with God, God will begin to reveal to you secrets about a lot of things) so be in fellowship with him and he will give you clarity and satisfy your every need because he said his children shall not lack!

Give your troubles to God and let His joy be your strength to overcome because YOU CAN! Let this be the day you begin to choose JOY 💛💜💙